Being back here in Canada with only a few days left on my hotel account and not having a meeting with the disability office till Monday at 2pm is causing me quite a lot of stress. I really shouldn't worry. At the very least there is a hostel I can both afford and stay at till my meeting. Or, I can probably somehow swing the deposit on a room for rent till I receive my benefits check, presumably on Monday.
In the mean time all I have to keep my hopes afloat is this book. So, I added the scene 'Give him what he wants'. Everyday, I try and start fleshing out another scene from my list of scenes to write and everyday this book becomes closer and closer to the reality that I see for myself. This book and hopefully many more to come after it is the only hope I have for my future. It is the only way that I can how I may be able to reverse some of the tragedy that has befallen me due to the symptoms I suffer from narcolepsy. Not to mention the very odd and strange set of events that has led me to believe I am the Christ and now the messenger God's angel.
I bought a book to read for a dollar at the discount store called 'The Miracle Game' by Josef Skvorecky. So far it is about a teacher in Czechoslovakia sent to teach a class in language at a girls school. Reading always inspires me which is good because I feel so alone now trying to sort out my fractured life with the limited resources I have. But, writing always helps. I just wish I didn't feel so nervous. But, that is probably the Ritalin which won't be a problem after I see the doctor tomorrow or the day after because they don't prescribe me Ritalin here in Canada but Modafinil, which I can never recall feeling anxiety from.
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